"I’m doing so much better now."
"I’ve made so much progress."
"I’m so happy."
Lying is becoming way too easy. And I feel so bad because I still feel like utter shit but I’m getting so much help and its such a waste. I say I don’t think about suicide anymore but the truth is I can barely think about anything else. Everyone thinks I’m getting better now but I am so far from okay.
All being in hospital has taught me is how to control my impulses just long enough to get out from hospital and kill myself. I am fighting the urge to walk out my front door and jump in front of a lorry. Someone else should be getting help instead of me.